I haven’t blogged in some time. I’ve been experiencing life to the fullest. Maybe a little too much some will say. I entitled this post, “Getting Played” because that’s what happened to me.
(Note: This post will not be posted on any social media sites. This is extremely personal but I hope that it will keep someone else from making the same mistake I did)
So, I began “dating” a guy friend who I grown extremely close to. I called him my boyfriend when in actuality he was someone that I hung out with and dated. Before we began “dating” or “seeing each other way more”, I shared with my now ex-best friend that I was deeply in love with him and that I love him. He shared that he loved me a few weeks prior and it caught me off guard. I should have said it to him then because I felt the exact same way. Then this “situation-ship” began and it was going extremely well. We were communicating almost everyday, several times a day. We went to the gym together several times a week. I was even hanging with his family often. I even met some of his closest friends and was at events with these friends. We were closed.
Then the communication began to seize. He would call or text less. We weren’t going to the gym together as often mostly due to me not going at all. Even our interactions became more distant and I didn’t understand why. Then, we had a talk one night and he told me that I made things “awkward” between us and it was becoming harder to be together. Later, I found out that he cheated on me with someone I considered a friend. I remembered liking a bonfire picture on Facebook. I found out that they did the “dirty deed” at that bonfire. Then, being the naive woman I was, I sent him a voicemail that I love him and that I was deeply in love with love that same night we had our “talk”. Then the next evening, everything blew up. We got into a heated argument I called him on his lies and he pretty much denied having any feelings for me. He called me a “Sister-in-Christ” granted that it’s true because we are a part of His great kingdom. The juggler: This man has been going around our young adult ministry group telling everyone that he was going to marry me, me Christina Stewart. I take marriage very seriously. It’s sacred. For him, this was just a game to him. I was the game and he was the gamer, having full control.
What makes matters worst is that this ex-best friend of mines was in on this game that was me. She hated that we worked together although she helped me get the job I’m currently at. She made up this pathetic lie about this “situation guy” and it caused her to lose her job. They both tried so hard to de-frame me that it backfired on the both of them. They made it seem like I was the one lying when in reality our friendships and relationship ended up being a lie. My only fault in this is falling in love with the wrong guy and not getting out of this “situation-ship” when I could have a while back.
This taught me the great lesson to stop being naive, thinking people could change eventually because people show you who they really are from the jump. I have a great heart. I make mistakes. I made mistakes in both the friendships and relationships. I am not perfect. I don’t intend to be either. However, I will never treat anyone like crap. I try my hardest to be honest with everyone but even in doing that, I have to be careful with what I share.
Before you get involved with someone, check all the facts about them, I mean all of them. If that person begin to show signs of uncertainly, leave immediately. Don’t get trapped in their games. Most importantly, know who YOU ARE, what YOU ARE ALL ABOUT, what YOU WILL TOLERATE and what is UNACCEPTABLE in YOUR LIFE. YOU ARE KINGS and QUEENS. BE TREATED AS SUCH. MOST IMPORTANT, TREAT YOURSELF AS SUCH.